Monotone
by Sentimental Meteor
Summary: I met a girl under full-bloomed cherry blossoms and my fate has begun to change. Bubbline two-shot.
1. Chapter 1

Frail.

That's the only thing you need to know about me.

I always remember being hooked up in many cables. Beeping sounds always drummed in my ears, drowning other sounds I've been hearing; the birds outside, the families waiting on the other side of the room, the conversation the people on white always had with both of my parents…

All of that had been muted.

The beeping sound keeps me wide awake, like always. I keep thinking that those sound, the beeping, the electronic and robotic sound coming from a machine beside me, is my lifeline. Which when I got a little older, I will know that it really is.

And then there was 'the people'. The people that always have white coats and white overalls on them with their clipboards and pens that make me feel... weird. I still don't know the word but I will realized later on that I was just self-conscious.

Sometimes I like this place. It makes me feel light. But most of times, it's not. Looking at the four corners of the room with the white walls that completely surround me, this, all of this is making me so claustrophobic.

This room should make me feel better.

That's what they always say.

But truthfully, it doesn't.

And then every once in a while, there's always this pain in my chest. That even the small little girl inside of me couldn't take the pain anymore.

The rushing of feet always keeps me awake. And then they became blurred. They always moved me in another room when I started to feel this pain in my chest, when the beeping sound of the machine changes its beat and when there are black spots at the corner of my eyes due to the pain I couldn't hide anymore.

This _another_ room is not the same as the white room I'm always caged in.

This room always has a bright light up ahead.

I always want to reach it.

But I can't, because every time I reach for it, I just couldn't.

My right arm wouldn't move. My whole body is numb, already sleeping. Only my mind is awake.

They always said something, something soothing. I always panic after that because I already knew what will happen.

Like always, one of them - not the one with the soothing voice - carried the thing I fear the most, a needle encased in some plastic I don't know.

This is what always happens after those sweet words.

I don't want to sleep when I'm all numb. I'm afraid that I will never wake up.

But one of them still keeps me going, saying something soothing. I don't know what she's saying anymore. Maybe encouraging words like always.

I tried to focus on the person speaking. She is new. I know it. She has a mask and cap, and wearing those blue overalls like any of them would when I'm in this room. I don't know how I could tell – maybe of her presence.

My eyes are slowly closing now. Her words are like mantra in my ears. It's calming. I like her voice. That person doesn't sound like any of the people in white are. (They're the ones that always makes mom and dad cry but sometimes happy too although that's not very often.)

And then I slightly close my eyes, not completely shut down since I still saw some light and something that bothered me.

I tried to will my eyes not to close even for just a few seconds just to understand what I was seeing, because the doctor - she gave me _this_ look I don't understand at all.

I really don't have the time to understand things since I'm slowly drifting away and the blackness is already creeping behind my eyes.

But later on, when I got a little bit older, when I understand more things in this life than before, I realized that the look she - the doctor - gave me was just a look of pity.

* * *

A/N:

If you haven't noticed it yet, I really tried hard not to give a hint who is the on the first person point of view. :D

Well, who do you think it is? Marceline or Bonnibel? xD


	2. Chapter 2

AN:

Guest: Hahaha. You made me laugh at your review and so, here you go. Thanks by the way :D

GabyBlue98C: Me too XD

This is the last part of the two shot. Thank you everyone. Your reviews, favorites, and follows mean so much to me.

Also, I kind of forget to add on the first part that the line 'I met a girl under full-bloomed cherry blossoms, and my fate has begun to change' is from the manga of Naoshi Arakawa, "Shigatsuwa Kimi no Osu" or more commonly known as "Your Lie on April".

So anyway, is your guess right? Let's see... Bonnibel or Marceline? :D

* * *

8 years later and I'm still the frail person my 7 year-old self had been enduring.

'At least I'm still alive' were always at the back of my mind.

I'm always prepared to die. I already sink that in my mind and just to prepare myself in it, I always say _I love yous_ to my dad and mom, to my little brother.

I have friends and I have the perfect life everybody wants. But ever since I ended up collapsing in third grade in the middle of the class, my life changed. I had to repeatedly go in and go out of the hospital. The amount of time I spent there grew longer and longer while my time at school grew lesser and lesser. I basically never went to school. It's really a pity since I like learning new stuff.

 _Pity._ I used that word again. I shook my head.

I knew very well that my body is not doing well. And I knew that that is the thing that separates me from other teens.

I looked outside my windows from the hospital bed I'm currently lying. I saw students, walking down the street, smiling, laughing, talking, and bouncing with all the happiness they can all receive. I saw the color of their uniforms and knew that the students I saw are attending the same school that I've been attending to. Maybe we're in the same year, I thought.

Suddenly, I heard a rap on the door and a nurse came in with a wheelchair. Funny how I called the nurses and doctors as people on white coats and white overalls when I was younger.

I couldn't help but smiled from the memories.

"Hello there," she smiled at me with her eyes twinkling bright. "Are you ready for our walk?"

I stifled a laugh trying not to burst out loud from her words. I wanted to say, 'Oh you mean our walk where I'm sitting in a wheelchair and you pushing it?'

And then guilt flooded through me. It's not her fault that she's a nurse in this hospital and that she's working too hard.

I just nodded for an answer, still feeling guilty. I stood up and she helped me in the wheelchair.

I can really walk but I prefer watching things, feeling the air and all the liveliness all around me while I'm just sitting in the wheelchair both mom and dad bought. Sometimes when I feel it, I would walk around. The hospital I've been currently staying at has a park and sidewalk for patients to walk around. Walking is good and breathing fresh air is nice. My mom would say.

I never believed her but I tried, thus the reason why everytime I'm here, after a therapy, a nurse would come and walk with me.

The nurse pushed the wheelchair outside my room, walking down the aisle to the elevator and down the ground floor. She talked to me now and then. Moments later we were both outside. I breathe in the air and I coughed.

Augh. I think I inhaled some air particles, I thought.

The nurse stroked my back, her hand going up and down my back. It relieved me and I let her know that I'm now okay. She smiled.

She pushed my wheelchair again and told me funny stories. It's really funny and I couldn't help but laugh.

It didn't even occur to me that we were now on the sidewalk, I just noticed it when some petals from the cherry blossoms fell on my lap. I touched it and looked up.

I sharply inhaled a breath. The scenery just amazed me. The sidewalk is wide; wide enough for a truck to pass through but vehicle-emitting-smokes are strictly not allowed to cross here. Instead people are walking on it. Old people with their nurses, kids with their mom and dad, middle aged people with their caretakers. All kinds of patient. But one thing this place is famous for is the rows and rows of cherry blossoms that stood along the path. Right and left there they are with their petals all visible and blooming.

I inhaled. And I smiled gratefully because this is nice air.

"The usual place?"

"Yes, please."

She moved the wheelchair down the path where cement meets grass and grass meets soil, just beside a tree. This is the usual place where I'm usually sitting on my wheelchair. With the shades of the trees covering, the air that feels so clean and the season when the cherry blossoms are in full bloom. I love this season.

"Do you need something else? Do you want to walk?" The nurse asked me thoughtfully like always.

I shook my head no. "I don't want to want to walk around. I already feel comfortable in this place. Do you have my inhaler?"

"Yes," she took my inhaler from her shirt pocket and gave it to me.

I shook it and I already knew that there's nothing left but I still tried to use it, putting the end to my mouth and breathing in while I push the other end.

"Nothing left?" The nurse asked me when she noticed my discomposure.

"Almost gone." I corrected her since I still felt the substance at the back of my throat, somehow easing the constricted pain in my chest.

"Do you want me to bring a spare? I can run for it if you want, the hospital's just around the corner."

"Yes, please."

"Anything you need?"

"I'm thirsty."

"Okay, I'll grab a bottle of water on the way back." and then she took off running.

I inhaled a breath again and let my back fall completely at the backrest of the wheelchair. I could see a field of grass where kids play and families go picnic together. I smiled because it was a refreshing view and not like a scene from the four walls I'm always enclosed in.

And then I frowned because I remember something my friend said about sceneries. She said people had different perspective; their views in things. I nodded because I understand. "Just like a scenery," she said after.

I asked her what she meant.

"What I see, what I hear, and what I feel the moment, it's all now painted in colors. My whole scenery is now painted in bright colors, especially when I'm with him." She added.

I understand that she's talking allegorically since people can see colors except if their blind of course.

I wanted to argue with her but I think it's better if I just keep it all through myself

After all, the scenery I could just see is monochrome... I see it all in black in white. In routines. Hospital. House. And then School. That's the usual cycle. That's my daily routine.

I straightened my back to see the other end of the horizon. What I saw were buildings. A metropolis, I thought.

I slipped off the slippers I'm wearing and touched the ground. The grass tickled my feet and I realized that I like this kind of feeling. I stood up and leaned my weight on the tree beside me as support.

The wheelchair behind me slightly moved since it's in a flat cemented surface. On the other hand, I was standing up on the grass, trying to support my weak legs by propping up on a nearby tree.

And then I walked, now wearing my slippers, and left my wheelchair behind trying to circle around the tree.

And I suddenly stopped on my tracks.

There was a girl sitting with her back not on this tree but on the next tree next to mine. She was listening to music; she was wearing earphones. There was also a notebook perched on her lap and a pen.

I could see all these things since I'm not that far from her and that the trees were just meters apart from each other. It was a good picture really. She looking like she doesn't have a care in the world; just in her little world. And of course let's not forgot the sudden blow of the air, making the cherry blossoms flying on a whim.

Then as if she realized that there's another girl looking at her, the girl looked up to me.

I suddenly looked away like I'm guilty and proceeded to walk, circling around the tree.

I closed my eyes, wanting to savor the moment; the breeze of air drifting through the atmosphere around me, lightly touching my skin. I turned in a full circle around the tree but I still continued walking until I crashed with someone. In which that someone is the said girl.

Of course, I felt a pain but this pain is not the same when I needed to undergo a full heart surgery. Just a normal pain from a sudden bump. It's a good thing she took a hold of me before I landed on the ground.

"Oh glob! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she said to me, still holding my arms for support.

She lowered me down on my wheelchair, which isn't that far from us.

"Dang it! I'm really, really sorry." She said her voice sounded so alert and really sincere.

I waved my hand, "No, no. It's okay." I tried to stand up but before I could grab the seat to push myself up, she helped me again.

"Where's your caretaker? Patients have them right?"

"My nurse-" I corrected her. "-just went back at the hospital to get some spare inhaler for me."

She bopped her head as if she understands what I'm talking about.

I was about to thank her for helping me when my nurse got back with a bottle of water in her hand.

"Well, hello there. Glad you made a friend." The nurse smiled at me, taking notice that there's someone helping me up.

I wanted to correct her that the girl is just some bystander who I think wanted to talk to me (thus the reason why she approached me) but I didn't.

The nurse gave me the bottle of water. Unfortunately, she also told me that my parents are now back in the hospital and that's the end of our so-called walk.

The nurse pushed the wheelchair away from the girl, away from the trees, away from all of this but still I looked back wanting to have a last glance at the beautiful scene and that's when I saw the girl waving, smiling so wide I think it would stretch her face.

"Bye Bonnibel!" She shouted behind me.

My eyes widen with surprise. She knows me? I find myself asking myself.

"I'm Marceline by the way!" and then she laughed.

I smiled at her thinking and hoping that she could see that I'm smiling back at her.

"Get well soon, okay? See you at school!" She yelled again.

I didn't realize that I wanted; needed someone to tell me that.

It never occurred to me that some girl is waiting to me to get back at school.

I don't remember her from anything. Maybe we had been group mates at some point and that's the reason why she knew but still it felt good that someone - other than my family and my best friend - is waiting for me.

And now, I'm looking forward to improve my condition and I surprised myself since that never ever happened to me because my life is always tied to a beeping machine, counting my last days until it's the end for me.

But this time I met a girl under full-bloomed cherry blossoms and my fate has begun to change.

I take in a new scenery I never thought I could see in my whole entire life.

And I'm thankful, very thankful because that has made all the difference.

I realize this life is worthwhile and I stopped counting the days, and take a leap of fate and started running.

* * *

6/11/2016


End file.
